We all feel sad sometimes, but that doesn’t necessary mean that we’re actually experiencing clinical depression.  Sadness is a normal human emotion that can make life more interesting. Much art and poetry is inspired by sadness and melancholy. Sadness almost always accompanies loss. Sadness also helps us appreciate happiness more.

Normal sadness, like other emotions, is temporary and fades with time. During the COVID-19 Pandemic, fear, frustration, national division, extreme weather patterns, social distancing, unrest and grief may find you feeling down more often than normal. While these times are not normal, the feelings inspired by them are a natural human response to things that challenge our comfortable lifestyle. Take note of your feelings and give yourself time and space to process them. Healthy processing of emotions can bring healing, inspiration and positive action. Here are some ways to experience normal sadness in a healthy way and to allow this emotion to enrich your life:

  –  Allow yourself to be sad. Denying such feelings may force them underground, where they can do more damage with time. Cry if you feel like it. Notice if you feel relief after the tears stop.  Allow yourself a day to be alone, listen to music, and observe your thoughts and feelings. Setting aside self-care time to acknowledge your feelings can actually help you ultimately move into a happier mood

  –  Think and/or write about the context of the sad feelings. Are you sad because of a significant loss or an unhappy event? Although it may be simple to discover the cause of the sadness, it takes patient reflection to understand the underlying reasons for your sadness. Exploring those feelings through writing or drawing can help you feel better.

  –  Take a walk. Sometimes some fresh air, gentle movement and a little quiet time can change your perspective.

  –  Call a close friend or family member. Sometimes venting your feelings can help you process them. Choose a trusted listener who tends to give you faith-filled feedback rather than “piling on” with their own feelings.

  –  Be kind to yourself. This may include a hot bubble bath, indulging in a nap or splurging for some really good chocolate.  Self-care is an essential tool for healing.

  –  Let yourself laugh. Fire up a favorite comedy and binge watch for a while or find a funny YouTube video.

  –  Start a gratitude journal. Focusing on the positive, even if you can only think of one thing to be grateful for per day, helps you to shift away from the negative, sad feelings.

  –  Remember that sadness can result from a change that you didn’t expect, or it can signal the need for a change in your life. Change is often stressful, but it is necessary for growth. If you’re sad because you need to change something, think about the steps you can change to make your life more joyful. Do you think it’s time to participate in some social change? Connect with others who pursue peaceful efforts to change others’ lives for the better.

  –  Pray.  The Lord knows our heart and knows the deepest reasons for our human feelings.  But his yoke is easy. Talking to Jesus and then listening for his reassurance and love can help us feel heard, loved and held.  Let the divine healer walk alongside you. Your parish is here to support and encourage you.

If these techniques for coping with sad feelings do not alleviate your pain noticeably, your sadness lasts for more than 2 weeks or your feelings interfere with your ability to function, call your doctor immediately.  Better to consult a professional who can help you quickly or be reassured you are experiencing normal healthy emotion than to hide your pain and suffer long term effects in your health or relationships.  Help is always available.

For any questions or concerns, contact Leah, Director of Pastoral Care, leah.harris@dsj.org.